words invade
unwanted
wanted
they torment 
conflict
collect together 
forming lines
that demand to be written

controversial lines
political lines
self-indulgent lines
angry lines
lines that betray belief
passion spewed across white paper
meanings misconstrued
misinterpreted

released by the writing…

Time measured in emotion,
hangs around,
a guest outstaying their welcome.
The hands of time
shove you against the wall,
trapping you there,
then, casually,
finds something else to do.
Suspended,
unable to move on,
you look at time,
you…

It's vast, this space you have left.
I knew I would miss you,
of course I would,
but what should I do now
with this space?
Yes, there is a sort of freedom,
your parting gift,
what you wanted us…

it feels close now
have we held you back
stopped you leaving
made you hang on
just a little longer
am I ready
no I am not
never thought I would miss them
my parting words
the same every time…

you look tired
shall I sing you a lullaby
to help you sleep
can you sing
you ask
yes I say
I sing the lullaby
your eyes close
then
when the music stops
your eyes open
somewhat surprised
you say…

I reached for your hands
you let me hold them
did not push me away
this time you stayed
we danced
your face
your eyes
sparkled
you know
don't you
no need to mask
with me
with me
you can…

I press myself into your chest
close my eyes and dance
Nina Simone sings
my arms wrap tighter
entwined
we move as one
slowly
deliberately
unaware of who
or where we are
in these tentative
fleeting moments
we feel free…

what doesn't kill you 
makes you stronger 
it doesn't 
layers 
relentlessly 
painfully 
stripped  
eroded 
one  
by  
one 

is that you 
I can't see you 
are you in there 
your smile 
your laugh 
your voice 
monotone 
without colour 
I  
miss  
you

waiting to hear 
waiting to know 
waiting in fear 
waiting in hope 
waiting for sleep 
waiting for dawn 
waiting to stop 
waiting to start 
waiting in line 
waiting in time 
waiting for you 
waiting for life

I miss the silence 
occasionally deafening 
I miss the comeraderie 
when we clapped and held a light 
I miss the frequent family chats 
via zoom and what's app 
I miss you telling me 
stay safe wear a mask 
I miss…

tens 
hundreds 
thousands 
unnoticed they die 
their number up 
but never called 
demographic unknown 
daily updates forgotten 
next slide please forgotten 
wash your hands forgotten 
wear a mask forgotten 
keep your distance forgotten 
warnings  
disregarded 
unheeded 
tens 
hundreds 
thousands 
unnoticed…

I sailed on a sea of green 
I sailed on a sea of blue 
swam in the sea of hopeless 
was lost in the ocean of you 

I sailed on a sea of sacrifice 
where fear of failure abounds 
drifted…